/rant/
1. OK, now for some apparent reason, I know a few couples that are in the process of conception. Let me first say how much fun that must be. Seriously, you get an excuse to get laid and you are actually, like accomplishing something. You get yelled at for abandoning ship, instead encouraged to man batten the hatches and weather the storm. Anyone who has ever been in a birth control relationship knows the joys of oral contraceptives.

But to the point, baby names.

Please please please do not banish your child to the plight of eternal gaydom by giving him a retarded contrived name. What is wrong with the names that people have been using for years? It has been economically proven that giving your child a contrived name sets him up for less prosperity. He will be looked upon more favorable by his peers if his name is Samuel, John, or Paul. So what if there are three other Michael’s and Maria’s in his class and his initials aren’t pretty, other people had the right idea as well!

Black people, are you listening? You live in America now, you don’t have to invent some African name that isn’t even African to feel that you are following in kind with your culture. Look at other cultures.. How many messed up Asian names do you hear, you don’t see them giving their children Asian names in America.. How many Harry Woo’s and John Kim’s do u know….

You are securing not only his/her sexuality but, his/her future lively hood. You are investing when you make babies people, don’t waste your livelihood.

2. Women, eat your damn food. Please stop pulling of bread, exploring sauces and eating only the meat and not the lettuce. The menu does not say:

  • A large patty of meat, served in a delectable prearrangement that is easy reconfigured for maximum flavor, suggested reconfiguration in burger form

Order it, eat it. That simple. If you want to loose weight, eat healthy, eat less more often, and get of your ass and take the stairs. Stop picking at food like birds, its just UN-damn-civilized.

/*rant*/

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